17 Weeks

As I near the 17 week mark of deployment, I find myself curious about when exactly time will slow down this time. Last deployment it was when we had about 3 more months left of a 12 month deployment. Time was suddenly at a complete standstill. I discovered during the first deployment that the first part and last part of the deployment were the worst parts. The first part your trying to figure out who you are without them. You are trying to figure out what you will do with all that time alone. You figure out quickly that something has to be done or you will end up eating a bag of Cheetos and drinking wine on the couch every night. Not exactly the best habit to have. I have found that it is okay to have a day or two after they leave to wallow. You sit and watch annoyingly unhappy, sappy movies...whether it be a romantic drama or depressing tear-jerker. And that's OK! But, then after that you have to pick yourself back up, set goals, and move on with life. Now, the last part of deployment is a bit like the days leading up to Christmas. You are nervous and excited about what Santa will bring to you this year. You can't wait for Christmas morning so you can dig into the presents. So, that's the last couple months of the deployment. Then the night/day before they come home is so much like Christmas Eve. Your sitting in your bed at 300 in the morning trying not to open your eyes for fear that Santa may in fact see you and then you will not receive your present. That's also what I like to call the waiting part. Waiting for a phone call as to what time they are coming home the next day or that night. You sit and wait, you can't sleep...you are just too excited. After that its Christmas morning, the day you get your present (or in this case your husband). You arrive at the designated location to greet them. Then you see them. The plane pulls up and they all start marching towards you. Then they STAND there and you have to listen to a speech, all the while you are going insane inside. Oh and if you have already made eye contact with your solider, then forget it. It's the best torture ever. This is just like Christmas morning because it feels like the anticipation of sitting on the top of the stairs waiting for permission to come down to see your loot. Anyways, those are the best moments. Homecoming is unlike anything you have ever experienced, which is probably why the last few months drive you nuts. So, again, I say..when will time begin to slow down. This deployment is shorter than his first one, so I anticipate that it could happen at any moment. It's like the worst and best thing at the same time. Time may be at a standstill, but at the moment it happens it's good because you know that your soldier coming home is right around the corner. Just breathe and know that he will be in your arms once again and life will be good. Tick tock, tick tock..when will the clock stop for you?